Silence.

This distance is killing me.

 The pain that i feel numbs me.

 Slow, quiet death. No one will ever know.

 I wish i could talk it out. Tell him how i feel, what i think, but I'm scared that if i do, I'll push him away. Him and everyone. Wait a minute. Isn't that what I've always wanted? I don't want everyone around. I don't want my thoughts to be heard and my words to be listened to. I want to be left alone in the rain. I want the water to soak me, cleanse me of all my impurities, my sins. The water will never be clean again. I have stained it.

 And for that, I am sorry. 

I have pushed myself into silence. Martin Luther King Jr said that Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. But what if your silent to protect someone? To protect yourself? What if you HAVE to be silent. What if silence just cant be helped?